Stop Stepping Back: The Truth About Women, Leadership, and Ambition

How do we tackle this persistent paradox? Are women not interested in taking on leadership and senior roles? Or are they, to the contrary of the rife stereotype, willing to steer organizations from the pilot’s seat? Regrettably female professionals’ path to executive level positions is not straightforward nor as well-paved as it is for their male colleagues. Is it really a tricky dilemma or is it a man-made issue (literally)? We are being placed into these molds, these imaginary obstacles—like the fear of being judged as aggressive' for the same traits men are praised for—that keep you from steering your organization from the pilot's seat.

Women at the workplace have always faced resistance and challenges. This begins with dominant social norms and cultural restrictions. It continues with being relegated into limited industries and hierarchy levels, effectively separating them from high-impact roles. Then there is the lack of support, whether it is the professional sponsorship expected at work or the social backing by family in sharing duties and responsibilities. Let’s not forget the age stigma, women are not allowed to get older (God forbid), the more experienced they become the harder the journey and acceptance rates. The worst two obstacles used against female professionals, time and again, in my personal opinion, are: being penalized for traits of assertiveness, ambition, and vision, in addition to being punished for motherhood and raising a family. Given all of these drawbacks and barriers, where do we as women stand? Are we fighting for what is rightfully ours? Are we setting the records straight? Or are we surrendering and accepting the status quo, mostly out of frustration?

If I am being honest and realistic; this is not an easy war to fight and win. The odds seem to be going against women most of the time. I myself was often judged and stereotyped as aggressive, too blunt, and intimidating—traits for which male leaders were praised, but I was criticized. Seniority is paired with a high sense of responsibility; executives should have the ability to make critical well-founded decisions to produce results, profit and achieve goals. This requires a high level of authority and command, unless you are a woman, of course. These contradictions - Be confident but not aggressive, decisive, but approachable, Speak up but don’t dominate - are exhausting. Most importantly they are very real. If we are being placed into these molds, should we conform to these expectations? Or should we redefine the rules and refuse to be labeled and judged?

Do we need permission to strive for career success or leadership positions? Do we comply with the implied notion of stepping back at a certain age or after a certain life event (yes believe it or not, motherhood)? Many are even told to lower their expectations or to be grateful to have the mid-level or senior job in the first place. Women tend to be promoted on merit and results, men on potential, yet the explanation for a successful woman’s rise is suspicious? Couldn’t it be that she’s really good at what she does? How did we arrive here although research shows a higher success rate and better performance for companies who have women onboard their C-Suite.

Which brings me to a very serious topic: SPONSORSHIP. Have you heard of professional sponsorship before? I know I haven’t until I was researching for this article. Sponsorship is: a senior leader actively using their influence and connections to champion a high-potential junior employee's career growth. These leaders advocate for promotions, create opportunities, and increase the visibility of their protégés, not based on their achievements, results, and accomplishments but by using their "power" to champion their mentee. While mentorship is advice, sponsorship is action. Most women go through their career without having one sponsor, not a man nor a woman? What is to be done to overcome this very serious hurdle? Do women need more allies? Should they improve and enhance their self-promotion skills, since studies show that females are very bad at promoting themselves and their work? The point that I find most difficult to understand is how do these leaders justify this biased behaviour to themselves, hold on, do you think they do not even recognize these systemic blind spots to start with?

You’ve come to realize that the 'modesty and compliance’ you were taught to value are often mislabeled by the corporate world as a lack of ambition. In my upcoming training, “Power, Presence & Purpose: Advancing Women into Senior Leadership” we’re moving past the frustration of being misunderstood and starting to set the record straight. We dismantle the imaginary obstacles—like the fear of being judged as 'aggressive' for the same traits men are praised for—that keep you from steering your organization from the pilot's seat. We will master a specific 'Authority Script' designed to help you claim your rightful lead and secure the professional sponsorship you’ve been missing, all while staying true to your authentic style.